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Thursday, February 27, 2014
Repost: Loving Yourself Isn't the Whole Picture
Love is a state of being, a state of giving, a state of non-judgment, of awareness, of compassion and of "action."
It's a tricky thing, love; it's all about balance.
On the one hand it's not healthy to be so unconditional with your loving that you give everything away and have nothing left, or even worse, tolerate abuse.
And, on the other hand, it's not healthy to be so selfish that the only person you care about is you.
It's a fine line. I like to think of this way:
I like to be unconditional with my love in that I try not to judge other people and show up for them, but I have boundaries. I love people and nothing brings me more joy than showing up for people that I love. I love seeing people I care for thrive, be happy and live their dreams and their purpose. I thrive when those I love thrive. But, when I step out of self-care so much that there is nothing left for me to give, I know that I have entered into an unhealthy state and I pull back and focus on my self-care again.
At the same time, I am consciously self-ish. Not selfish. Self-ish.
To me that means I am self-focused enough to know that there are things I have to do for myself, not because I am self-centered, egotistical or a narcissist, but because it's my job to keep my own cup full. And I know that when my cup is full I have more to give away to those I love and to the amazing seekers in "The Daily Love" community.
There is no finite rule about how to do this. It's a balance that we all must learn and that is very personal to each person.
In extremes -- we can be martyrs with our love or narcissists. The goal is to be in the middle. The "Middle Path" is the goal.
Your love for someone shouldn't be measure by how much you are willing to suffer for them. And your love for yourself should not be so short sighted as to only include you, because on a spiritual Level, your brothers and sisters on this planet are all a part of you. We are one from a spiritual Point of view. To love only yourself is to miss out on the richness of life and loving other people. But to only love other people and not yourself is a setup for a breakdown.
Find your own intuitive way today to love yourself and to also love others. Find the balance and make it your intention to live The Middle Path.