Thursday, February 20, 2014

Sorry if I Couldn’t Be “The One” Right Now

I have never been in love. There I said it. Really, I know love and I am willing to love and be loved. But I have never been romantically in love.  With that being said, I apologize if I can’t be the ideal girl you are looking for right now. I have a lot of experiences in life – from happiness to struggle to even loss but I am inexperienced with loving another person romantically.

 I may appear to be a strong person who doesn't need a man in her life. Forgive me for having this stance, if you know what life threw on me, you would know exactly the reason why.  But that doesn’t mean that I don’t long for someone who will hold my hands in the future when I face another struggle. I want to be with someone who will never leave me in those times.

Forgive me if I never back down to challenges for I was raised to deal with them and see them positively. We may have a lot of discussions and different points of view and I will spend hours debating my point, but you should know that I just want you to understand me too. It’s not because I want you to accept what I think of, it’s just that I want to voice out my opinion to the extent of being tactless at times.  But that doesn't mean that I will not accept your point. I accept your point but like what I have said, I just want you to see what my point is.

Forgive me if sometimes I am inconsiderate of your feelings and wants. Please know that when I am comfortable with you I say what is really in my mind and heart. If we are not close friends, I may be careful with how I deal with you. In some way I know it’s wrong that I forget how you feel when we are closer to one another. But with you, I know I can be my true self and I want you to be in your true element too. With that being said, if ever I hurt your feelings or if I upset you, please let me know because in my mind I thought you would understand. But that doesn't mean that I mean to hurt you. I would never mean to directly hurt people, especially you. 

See! I will mess up big time. I am clueless with how to be your ideal girl. I am inexperienced. I am tactless. But I am learning. With each negative point you are giving me, I am giving a positive point to learning. I am a novice in this department and 100% sure that books could not help me on this. If you could not wait any longer (which I hope you will), I am sorry for not being your ideal girl. But I am not sorry for being me. Because someday, I will be better and someone will think of me being his “one”.   

1 comment:

  1. Anna, when you're no longer sorry that you're not the one, that's when you're ready to be the one for another person.

    I miss you.